Top Five Reasons Why Jim Grobe Didn't Take the Job

by John Expat on Dec 6, 2007 10:38 AM CST in Football Comment 3 comments

Ever since the shocking news broke that Jim Grobe was returning to Wake Forest, the entire Expats staff has been frantically working the phones to figure out what went wrong. Luckily, we have contacts deep within the Razorback Foundation, and we've learned that Grobe's decision was based on these five reasons:

1. Negotiations hit an impasse when the Razorback Foundation wouldn't give him a cell phone plan with unlimited text messaging.

2. Was promised that his name would be displayed on banners all over the state...then he found out what that meant.

3. Beck Campbell wouldn't sign off on the hire until Grobe could talk Pete Carroll into guaranteeing playing time for her Mitchy.

4. Read some Razorback message boards and realized that, by taking the job, he was denying Jimmy Johnson the opportunity to come home and fulfill his lifelong dream. Being a noble guy, Grobe didn't want to stand in the way.

5. Learned about the unbreakable voodoo curse that Houston Nutt put on the program before leaving...like Davis, Tuberville, Bowden, Fisher and countless others, he didn't want to deal with that.

Winston-Salem Journal file photo

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At least we were on the right track with this guy. At least it would have been a step up for him. It is now clear that the only target left is a hot young oc or dc. They will be hungry to win and most importantly will not turn down a head coaching position. I mean, surely we won’t get turned down by an assistant right? Right?

by pubb13 on Dec 6, 2007 1:15 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

Crazier things have happened, Pubb. I’m learning to declare nothing outside the realm of possibility.

You are right though about going for a coordinator. Long should take the list of Broyles’ award finalists from the last five years and start making calls.

I want to hear about Charlie Strong and Brent Venable especially.

by hogcaller on Dec 6, 2007 2:00 PM CST reply actions 0 recs

Funny top 5 reasons. The Hog coach search has made some out-of-state coaches very rich, and that is a good thing….. maybe. Maybe Hogs could get the coach from UAM or SAU to take a look at the job. Or, Forte from UAPB is looking for a new gig, go for it.

by Razorbutt on Dec 7, 2007 8:39 AM CST reply actions 0 recs